Come Together: The Science (and Art!) of Creating Lasting Sexual Connections

We’ve had Come Together for just 3 weeks (it arrived 2 days after its January 30th release), and it already feels like it should be in the kitchen with the cookbooks. Emily has the rare quality of making complex, science-based, yet very hands-on strategies and practices feel like they come straight from her heart to yours. The book has the same super-easy-access structure as her bestseller, Come as You Are, which, a decade after its publication, is still the reigning authority on women’s sexuality. If I had to pick just one piece from the book to pass on, it’d probably have to be “Pleasure is the Measure.” That simple-seeming coinage, not sex itself, not any of the myriad issues shared life involves, cuts through so many thickets: do you and your partner bring pleasure to your partner's life and to your own? Can your relationship - despite health crises, financial challenges, childrearing, work demands, lost socks, and a thousand distractions - nurture a mutual joy in living? We need this book. There’s a pretty good chance you do too.

Every couple should read this. Emily uses easy to understand dialogue to break down intimacy road bumps in relationships. I read this together with my spouse to get the most out of the book.

so grateful for this book synthesizing the best voices in the field AND conjuring tried and true things that will affect your romantic life.

Emily Nagoski with another excellent book

If I am honest, Nagoski’s book Come Together: The Science (and Art) of Creating Lasting Sexual Connections did not resonate with me as much as I had hoped. So then why did I rate her book five stars? I suspect that if a group of people were to read her book and discuss it, most would find that it spoke to them. I tend to think a little differently than most. If this topic interests you, go ahead and read her book. Even if something doesn’t resonate with me today, tomorrow it might. And I enjoy reading books that cause me think differently or expose to how others think.

The author clearly doesn’t want to have seggs with her partner and uses disproven “facts” to try and prove her point instead of stating these are clearly just her opinions. However, I did find some helpful suggestions, and love the visual idea of drawing a “house” that represents how you access your pleasure. I would say it’s a beneficial read for communication in relationships, but be aware if you have a high seggs drive the beginning of this book could be upsetting and feel like you’re being shamed for who you are (skip ahead if needed).

I love everything that Emily Nagoski writes. I am a couples therapist and will definitely be recommending this for my clients.

Or for those who wish to be in one—I gave this five stars because I loved the idea of using emotional floor plans and making context (as well as pleasure) central in creating long-lasting nurturing relationships. I also appreciate her normalizing dry spells. I also liked how this wasn’t a book just about the physical, but about enriching our relationships.

Loved learning more about the importance of context in long term sexual relationships. Should be required reading for every couple. Bought this as a wedding gift.

Mind changing - gut geschrieben, gut recherchiert.

Always looking to be a better partner and improve my relationship and super happy I got hold of this book before we had any issues.

Well written, informative.

I liked it, but she already decided to cheat and leave sooooooooooo