Mind The Gap: The truth about desire and how to futureproof your sex life

Brilliant book. This work brings together many aspects of human sexuality and the social contexts in an interesting and thoughtful way. I recommend this very strongly.

As a mum of three, my life is chaos, coffee-fuelled, and punctuated by constant interruptions. Mind The Gap gets straight to the point - practical, clear, and surprisingly doable advice on keeping desire alive even when your bedtime is the highlight of the day. Insightful, relatable, and refreshingly realistic. A lifesaver for exhausted parents who still want connection.

I liked this book! As someone who has been mystified by some of the rituals surrounding sex, especially with some of the women I have had intimate relationships this helped me get a grasp of some of the misconceptions that "society and the media" have use believe and what is reality for many of us. I do like the focus on empowering women, especially to be more assertive in some situations. Things I liked: 1) Discussion of sexual currency 2) Exploration of sex and not just being "traditional" PIV sex 3) Reviewing and understanding the conditions for sex and how this is complex and different for everyone 4) The example scenarios 5) The sum up questions at the end of the chapters I will read these points again :) I'm going to make a few points and you can take them or leave them as you wish. 1) The author mentions the orgasm gap, i.e. that men have more orgasms than women and this is important, but also states that frequency of sex is not important. Also I would like to point out that many women have the capability to have more intense and multiple orgasms that men will never experience. This presents another "orgasm gap" in society. I just wanted to get this perspective across. 2) From what I understand sometimes women do not want to achieve orgasm or perhaps state they have experienced it, because it gives their partner a perceived ego boost. I'm sure this is not just limited to male partners. This to me presents another dynamic and I would liked to have seen vulnerabilities and insecurities regarding this issue discussed.

This book has changed my life. I’m so glad I picked it up. Highly recommend actually working through each exercise, and involving your partner as well. We learned so many interesting things about each other, after 14 years together.

This is excellent, I recommend it to all my patients who want to explore female sexual desire

This book by Dr Gurney is an absolute must read for anyone looking to unlearn the unhelpful ideas and myths we are taught in our sex education and by society. Whilst this book focuses on the topic of desire, many many more topics are intertwined into this, which can benefit everyone on so many levels. It is well written, and easy to read, broken down into several parts and chapters, with reiteration of key points to help you learn without feeling as though you really have to try to memorise every detail. The exercises at the end of the chapter enable simple and practical implementation of many of the key topics discussed in the book, within your own life. You also do not need to be in a relationship, or have any issues with desire to read this book, as it functions as a very useful guide for your life long sexual journey.

There's a lot of misinformation and myths surrounding the issue of sex, particularly for women, but in this fantastic book, Dr. Karen Gurney creates an accessible, inclusive, well-evidenced (and even at times humorous!) resource for women and their partners. She expertly weaves together her experiences from her clinical psychologist therapy room, with evidence from academic papers, addressing and deconstructing social scripts as well as giving the reader tangible exercises to begin putting this new-found knowledge into practice. If you're in a long term relationship, this book, without a doubt, is a must-read resource. Even if you're not currently in a relationship, the book guides you to reflect on previous relationships and how you might approach your next one with the confidence to ensure you and your partner have a future-proofed sex life! Can't recommend highly enough.

Excellent book. I learnt so much and was telling everyone about it!

Superbe livre , m'a beaucoup aide à mieux me comprendre.

A good read…makes you think. I especially liked the distinction around why we want sex in the first place…this really made me pause and think. It might seem an obvious thing but the way the question is brought forward in the book was good.

Love the way the author describes everything. Good writing, enhancing.

Dr. Gurney helps us understand the nature of desire and offers valuable insight into the imbalances in our intimate lives between men and women. The book is well structured and takes you on a journey with practical exercise concluding each chapter. A book the world has been waiting for and definitely a revolutionary one.

Written for a women but a man can learn how to please her